I never claimed to be the ambassador for all men however, I can say with confidence that a growing segment of the male population thoroughly enjoys when a woman approaches them. We may not welcome it when it comes in a super aggressive way-reminiscent of ourselves- but when it is done correctly it is simply awesome.
However, women often transgress my theory with a simple action. It is usually committed by a group of females who believe it is a great way to break the ice. However, us men would beg to differ. The action I’m referring to is what I like to call the no-look assist.
A girlfriend of the interested party (who often is the more attractive friend) approaches the man and says something along the lines of “My friend finds you attractive”. Way to go ladies! Now all the pressure is 100 percent back on us. Why you ask? Because now we are expected to “man up” and make raves with the woman for whom we may or may not be interested in. Three things can happen in this situation. One is ideal and the other two are more likely yet less desirable outcomes.
First scenario, a man could play the role of the self sacrificing politician and approach the woman that he isn’t interested in and retrieve a phone number for the sake of diplomacy.
The second scenario is the man lets the fear of rejection overwhelm him and chooses not to take the risk in approaching. The man WILL have his manhood and/or sexuality questioned.
The third and most ideal scenario is the man with the confidence of Denzel complexion of Boris Kodjoe, eyes of Michael Ealy, fashion sense of Scott Disick and accent of Idris Elba decides to approach the woman beautiful yet shy woman and life proceeds becomes the metaphoric equivalent to “Fifty Shades of Grey” for the two. Yes, ladies the last examples is ideal; it’s also never ever happening.
The moral of the story is when the situation of pressure delegating between girlfriends arises 9 times out of 10 it is a recipe for disaster and more important than that us men find it extraordinarily annoying. This is why I feel women should begin in taking the lead in dating. Reason why? Simply because women are excellent in execution.
Currently in society, the female demographic is rapidly outpacing and outperforming males in many aspects of life. I knew this to be true when I was graduating college and had to take second and third looks just to spot out my fellow male graduates. With women now succeeding in the corporate world, naturally a woman would want to find a male counterpart to compliment their lives and fill the void that singlehood often plants. Women are admittedly picky and have higher standards then those men they so often talk about. However, with that said, women today also have it much more together than men. Maybe the reason why people make the wrong choice with their partners is because men usually do the initial choosing. It is understood that females are naturally more submissive and men are naturally the aggressors. With this understanding, women have found safety in this societal norm because of fear.
Rejection is the most common unspoken fears of most humans in the dating scene. Overcoming rejection is the difference maker on whether a woman settles for security or really does find that prince charming. However, on this planet princes do not ride horses and you lady do not live in an enchanted castle. In case you forgot it is easier for a woman to say no than for a man to say it. Yes, rejection is scary but even scarier than that is settling.
So should woman start doing a fair share of approaching the opposite sex? As I man I always endorse my side being gentlemen and doing the initial approach. However, if you as a woman with a certain set of credentials complains about being a approached by nothing but bum men; well maybe you should do something to change it.